


That Night

by Greenapples47



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alcohol, Cheating(?), Drunk Sex, F/M, I saw two ships, It popped out of my head, Not What It Looks Like, What Was I Thinking?, mistakes happen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-11-13
Updated: 2016-03-15
Packaged: 2018-02-25 05:16:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 8
Words: 8,807
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2609864
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Greenapples47/pseuds/Greenapples47
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's been two years since you've started dating the young Corporal Levi, Humanity's Strongest Soldier. But what happens when you wake up to find a different man in bed with you the next morning? Due to your trouble of memory, everything will eventually make sense and you'll realize.... That night was an unforgivable affair.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Please

Your eyes flickered before they open. Your head was constantly whirling like a carousel. Your eyelids were too heavy to open and reveal your black pupils. You felt exposed, naked. You shook your head to ignore the pain that was throbbing in your skull. You then felt a pair of steel arms securing your waist from behind, making you flinch. Your surprised gasp caused you to inhale a familiar scent yet, it wasn't your's. It's a scent that you haven't smelled ever since the new recruits joined the Survey Corps. You recognized it before...

The strong arms tightened their grip on you, causing you to yelp in tiredness. 

"You're... Hurting me, Lev--" You turned around, only to be greeted by a pair of tired green orbs.

Within a second, you screamed, pushing the man away from you, causing you to fall off your bed, landing on your rear. You shifted away from the bed, regardless of the pain you've given to yourself to view the culprit who wasn't the man you expected to be. Strangely, it was someone you knew well.

"E-Eren!? W-What the hell are you doing here!?!?" You grabbed a handful of bed sheets to cover your bare form.

"You don't remember?" Eren stretched as he let out a yawn. Apparently, he was in fact, naked as well.

"I certainly don't remember at all!!" You argued.

"Don't act like you didn't remember _all_ of it." Eren replied.

"What are you talking about??"

"Well.... You came onto me." Eren smiled with complete innocence, causing you to gasp in disgust.

"No! I would never--" You stared into space, trying to remember what happened last night. 

"B-But.... Levi's back--"

"They're still working on the expedition. It's been a while since they left." Eren scratches the back of his head, staring outside the window for a brief moment.

"But he's the one who..." You stared at Eren, lost in your words.

Eren shook his head with a grin, causing you to gain most of what happened last night.

"You were the one who..."

"Yeah."

"And that time when...."

"Yeap."

 

You began to run your fingers through your silk hair. Everything was starting to make sense. Even though you were able to put things together, you didn't like how the picture turned out. Actually, you despised it very much.

"Oh my gawd... I slept with you!!" You shouted in realization.

"Calm down--"

"No! Don't tell me to calm down! This is wrong Eren!!" You stood up, creating more distance between the two of you.

"How could this get any worse! How am I going to tell Levi!??" You yelled in frustration, causing you to wince in pain.

"We can both tell him." Eren suggested.

You turned to see the naked boy, covering his lower half with the other bed of sheets.

"What!? Are you crazy?! W-We can't just tell him--"

"You don't have to hide your feelings for me, (First)." He grabbed his pants from the end of the bed, slipping his legs through them.

"What??"

"We can tell Corporal together." Eren's smile never left his lips, not one bit, regardless of his tired muscles.

He approached towards you, one hand cupping your cheek. The soft touch made you feel uncomfortable.

"I love you, (First). I love you so much." Eren's confession confused you even more. 

He roughly presses his lips against your's, causing a spark in you to remember how it felt when he had kissed you last night.

You knew this was wrong. You're not about to cheat on your beloved lover. You would never betray him... So, you pushed Eren away from you, breaking the kiss.

"What we did last night wasn't real!" You wiped your wet lips that was covered in saliva.

"You do know that I belong to Levi, right!? You understand me, don't you?" You asked in a pleasing way, hoping he'd says yes or give a nod.

"You can't just tell me to forget all that's happened last night. I loved every second of it-I love you more than anything in this world!" Eren complained.

"No-"

"Yes! You're mine now (First). What's done is done. You won't regret this--"

"Don't touch me!" You slapped his hand away after he attempted to reach out to you for an embrace.

"Nothing will change the fact that I love Levi more than anyone else." You glared at Eren.

"Don't lie to me! You told me that you love me! You said that you missed me and you even wanted to kiss me! That clearly explains you don't need him anymore!"

"I thought you were Levi! Okay!? I thought he came back and I miss him--"

"Stop making excuses, (First)! Admit that you love me!"

"It's not true! I was drunk!" 

"Still, you were the one who had sex with me last night!"

"When people get drunk, they sometimes do stupid things that they don't remember doing! Like this for example!" You pointed at the bed, giving the boy your explanation behind your purpose.

A shock of dizziness ran through your mind, causing you to lose balance. You closed your eyes shut to endure the pain while you were caught in Eren's arms supporting you.

You went blank.


	2. Memory

"Jaeger, make sure you don't miss a single spot. If I see any dust, you're on cleaning duty for three months." Levi spoke as if his words were threatening. 

"Yes sir." Eren nodded as he continued his cleaning chores, double checking to seek any speck of dirt in the room he was assigned to tidy. 

It was a normal day like any other. Levi and his teammates had found the old headquarters hidden in the forest. Therefore, Levi's first priority was to clean the entire building within a day if everyone participated and stayed on track. Eren and his friends recently joined the Survey Corps. He didn't expect that half of his time with the Survey Corps was to clean everything he sees. But since he's gotten into the Corps, how could he possibly complain? Eren made sure the books were neatly organized in alphabetical order. He shifted a few furnished furniture around the room, only to earn a brief scowl from Levi.

"Just leave them the way they are. Don't move them around, you brat." Levi scoffed as he went back to his process of cleaning. 

"Yes sir." Eren nods again, sighing at the thought that he's been cleaning for over an hour, hoping he wouldn't earn three months of cleaning if he ever leaves one speck of dust in the room to be examined by the middle-aged clean freak. 

When Eren opened a desk that Levi had recently brought in, he noticed there was a picture of Levi's squad members along with Levi himself. Eren recognized his team members, surprised at how young Auruo looked back then before those wrinkles came in. And the cravat and all. Eren turns the photograph to the backside, only to reveal the date that the picture was taken which was about two to three years ago. Strange, Eren realized there was a sweet innocent girl standing by Levi, closer to him than any of his subordinates. To be exact, the girl was holding Levi's hand if you look closely. She had a pure face, her pearl teeth showing, her natural rose cheeks on display. The girl was quite beautiful, in Eren's opinion, which made him curious. 

_Where is she now?_

Eren doesn't remember seeing her around ever since he joined the Corps. He assumed that the girl had passed away. She must've been very close to Levi. A precious someone. 

"What are you doing, Jaeger?" Levi asks, causing Eren to jolt in surprise, nearly losing his grip on the photograph.

"I-I found this and I just wanted to see it." Eren explained.

Levi eyed his photograph Eren was currently holding onto. He then stares at the brunette.

"What's it to you? Digging up my personal things?" Levi snatched the photo from Eren, flapping it to get a good look at it. 

"Don't touch my stuff, brat." Levi clicked his tongue, shoving the photo back into the desk. 

"So where are we going to put this desk? Will this be your office?" Eren asks.

"Yes. Help me carry this desk towards that big ass window over there." Levi points straight at the draped windows. 

"Right." Eren began taking one side, slowly lifting up the desk, finding it a little heavy to carry.

"Don't drop it. s'pretty heavy so you be careful, you brat." Levi warned him.

"Alright, on the count to three, lift. Got it?" Levi takes the other side of his desk, his eyes focused on Eren.

"Yeah." Eren nods.

"One.... Two... Three--"

 

"Hi Levi!" A cheerful voice came in, causing Eren to free his hands and drop the desk to reveal who the person was that belonged to that voice.

"URGH!" Levi grunted in pain.

Eren swiftly turns to the Corporal, noticing that his foot had been caught under the desk. That wasn't good.

"Lift it up Jaeger!" Levi groaned as he tries to free his injured foot.

"R-Right! Sorry!" Eren quickly raises the desk, enough for Levi to remove his foot.

"Son of a-- I told you on the count to three." Levi growled while he sat down his bottom, frustrated with the boy already.

"Are you okay??" The girl asks, rushing to Levi's side.

"I'm fine, it's just a small injury. Not much of a big deal." Levi responded, glaring daggers at the innocent boy who stood in shame, yet awestruck at the same time, his eyes laying on the girl's.

The girl notices Eren's stare, then pushes a few strands of her hair behind her ear.

"You must be one of the new recruits!" She replied.

"Uh, yeah." 

"I'm (First). Cadet (first)." She offers her hand to the boy.

Eren realized that she resembled the girl who held Levi's hand in the photograph. Could it be....

"You're the girl I heard about." Eren spoke.

"Hahahaha! Levi's got nothing better to talk about but me, isn't that right, Levi?" (First) giggled, turning to Levi.

Levi stood up with a click of his tongue.

"Don't be stupid, (first)." Levi frowned.

Eren noticed how casually (first) spoke of Levi's first name. Therefore, he knew how close the two of them were.

"You two must be... Siblings?" Eren assumed.

Levi gives Eren a disgusted look while (first) laughed.

"That's funny, I'm starting to like this guy, Levi!" (First) tried to hold in her laughs that were constantly pouring from her pink lips.

Eren was dumbstruck. What made the two of them seem so close together? it can't be that....

"You see, Levi and I are together." (First) announced, holding Levi's hand.

Eren frowns at the image of (first) standing beside Levi. It was as if Levi wasn't a good match for you... In his opinion.

"I see." Eren nods in realization.

"Let's get back to work, shall we?" Levi whips a look at (First), causing her to stop in an instant, yet she had a hard time pursing her lips.

"Yes sir." (First) smiled.

As Eren watched the two of them stroll away from him, Eren felt a little different inside him. He felt the pounding of his heart, the heat burning his cheeks, his lips parted, imagining every perfect detail of the girl. Her nose, her eyes, her hair, oh how it made him feel indifferent. Eren admits the girl was even beautiful than in the photograph. She was extraordinary. 

"Hey! I bought you darjeeling!" Eren hears her speak even from a distance. 

"It took you that long?"

"Mike wanted to smell them to make sure they were the exact same kinds that you favored." 

"Well then, kudos to his nose." Levi's voice got quieter until silence came and surrounded Eren.

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

Over the years, Eren has been watching over your every move, analyzing you because you had piqued his interest. He couldn't stop staring until she noticed. She was very kind to the boy, earning his respects over time. And whenever Levi was nowhere to be found, Eren would strangely out of randomness bring up a conversation with (First). He found her amusing, her hobbies, her likes and dislkes. Her trust in him grew more and more. Their relationship that was forming over time leading Eren to believe that one day she would eventually come to him, despite the fact that she was with Levi. Eren didn't care to commit such a crime. He never felt different towards anyone but her...

 

Eren stroked your hair as you slept on the bed with an aching head. He plants two or more kisses on your face, praying that you were the person he had shared a special night with.


	3. Reckless

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This took place before the accidental incident... Warning: Sexual content

A couple days ago, Levi along with Hanji's squad decided to take a day into a sudden expedition at the last minute. They wanted to find out a theory of Hanji's to be true or false. Whatever they planned to do, you were unaware of it. 

"Why didn't you tell me earlier?" You asked.

"We didn't have time to think it through. We're just going outside the walls--"

"I'm coming with you." You demanded.

"No, you stay here. Since Eren has trouble transforming into his titan form, there's not much help he can do for us when we leave today." Levi replied, patting your head, reminding you that you were slightly shorter than him by a few decimeters.

"Well, what can I do?" You shrugged.

"I want you to look out for Eren. You guys get along well, right?" Levi knitted his brows together and cringed at their relationship.

"Why me?" 

"Hanji chose you to watch over him. If he goes uncontrollable, it's your job to stop him. I trust Hanji on her judgements so be careful. Got it?"

"You sound like a mom, Levi." You giggled, earning a smile tugging on the corner of his lips.

"I do not." Levi rustled your hair before leaving a quick kiss on your temple.

"I need to go now. Goodbye." Levi leaves you, covering his head with his green hood before he saddles up on his horse and joins Hanji's group.

You knew that he'd come back alive. You watched him leave until he disappeared into the forest. As for the other members in the Corps, they decided to go into town to buy some groceries. You pray that Sasha has the heart to save some potatoes or bread for everyone. The day was dim and the sky was cloudy. You hoped that the answers Levi and Hanji are looking for will come to them once they arrived. You were inseparable with Levi. This was practically the first time you stayed behind during an important expedition that Levi had set out to attend.

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------

Days turned to weeks and it made you feel lifeless after being separated from Levi. He hasn't been gone for this long before. It made you worry even more. And soon, you became stressed and depressed at the thought of losing Levi.

 

-A few days later-

"Yeah... Hey, how's your hand?" You asked.

"Oh, it still hurts. I haven't regenerated yet. You might need to help me bind my marks again. It's starting to bleed through the bandage again.

Eren shows you both of his hands, seeing that the red crimson color seeped through the white cloth.

"We should go inside and change it now, actually." You nodded.

"Okay." Eren smiled as he followed you into the headquarters. It was only the two of you. The building was quiet. You were comfortable with Eren ever since he joined, you felt less awkward with him.

Once you've reached your room, you took the first aid kit from your desk drawer and opened the kit.

"Sit on my bed." You patted on the seat beside you as he obeyed.

"Does it still hurt?" You questioned him.

"No. But the pain kicks in every once in a while." Eren winced as you unwrapped the bandage.

"Hanji is still trying to figure out why you can't control your titan powers..... Is it scary to change?" You gently cleaned his injuries with alcohol and cotton.

"Yeah. I'm always scared when I transform. I get amnesia when I turn into a.... Monster." Eren sighed.

"Oh, you're not a monster, Eren. You're a miracle. And I'm happy that you chose to join us to help humanity. That doesn't sound like a monster, does it?" You chuckled as you wrapped a new sheet of bandage around his hands.

Eren didn't know how to respond to that. He felt comfortable with you when he sparks up a conversation with him. It seemed as if he's known you for so long. And that's when it hit him. The situation in which he was in was a great advantage. He was in your room, sitting on your bed while you tended his injuries. Levi was gone too. Any minute now, he could secure you and devour you here and now. But instead, he decided to hold back the urge, trying his best to calm down. But that didn't help at all...

"(First).... I want to tell you something that.... You need to know...." Eren blurted out.

"Yes, what is it, Eren?" The way you responded to him so casually, it's always the reason why he felt nervous. You were always calm with him.

"You're.... Beautiful." Eren turned away, hiding his heated face from you.

"Why thank you Eren. Haha Levi never says that to me. All he says is, "You're a cute piece of trash." It's the nicest thing he's ever said to me. But, I cherish your compliment too, Eren." You smiled.

"Why do you say things like that?" Eren wore a disappointed face.

"What?"

"You always compare me to Levi." 

"I guess it goes to show how much I miss him aha..." You scratched your head in embarrassment. 

"Yeah.... If I left you, would you have missed me too?" Eren asks.

"Well of course! You're my friend, Eren, and you're very dear to me." You patted on Eren's shoulder.

"That's... That's not enough!" Eren bursted suddenly.

You watched him as he turned to you with desperate yet, angry eyes.

"Eren?"

"I'm...! You're more to me than that!" Eren rests his fist on his chest, showing his true devotion towards you.

"Family?" You grinned, thinking that you were able to read his mind, but you were nowhere near his true feelings.

"No!" His answer made your eyes open wide. You suddenly turned red, a darker shade than Eren's colored face.

"Eren, you do know that I can't think of you like that, right?" You became worried of Eren's confession.

Your words pierced him like a spear through the heart.

"Why? Is it because you love him more than me?? You told me a second ago that you cherished my compliment! Levi doesn't know how to treat a you right! He doesn't know how to love you!" Eren argued.

"And you do?" You became scared and confused of his actions.

"I... I love you more than he does! I love you ever since the day we met! I know it sounds crazy but, I can't let you go! Whenever I see you with him, I suffer a little inside. You're the only one who could make me feel---"

You got up to leave the room in a cautious state, not wanting to hear the words that Eren's been swallowing all these years. He grabs your wrist to stop you, turning you around.

"Stop it Eren!"

"Listen to me (First)! I'm not finished with you yet! Please--"

"I've heard enough! Let me go!"

"Isn't it a little careless of him to leave you here?"

"It's my duty to look after you! That's why..."

"Why are you shutting me out?!" His grip tightens on you, making you wince.

"Calm down, Eren! You're going to lose yourself!" 

"Not until you've given me a proper answer! I've waited too long to tell you!"

 

_Since when did he....._

 

 

 

"Hey! Is anyone here!?" A voice was heard. It sounded like Jean and the others. 

You figured that they returned from the village. With that, you shoved Eren away from you in a rude manner, opening the door and dashing through the hallways. He responds with a bit of hurt as he exhaled. His eyes turned sad. He didn't want to be rejected by you. All these years, he felt that you were leading him on. But that wasn't your intention.

"Hey! We were looking for you guys! Look! I bought some butter to go with the bread!" Armin said with cheerful joy.

You stood in the kitchen, noticing that Eren was standing behind you a calm state, playing his part and boy was he good at acting.

"Sasha didn't eat any, did she?" Eren spoke in a normal voice.

"Aw, come on! I only ate four baguettes!" Sasha responded with a whine.

"That's still too much." Armin commented.

"Okay, well, let's sit down together and eat." You wore a fake smile, taking the remaining baguettes to the table while Armin and jean brought the butter and knife. Sasha was already seated at the table, waiting for the food to come while Connie and Krista joined.

"Where's Auruo and the others?" You asked.

"Oh, them? They said that they'll catch up. They wanted to buy some wine or something like that before they come." Armin answered.

You sat down with the gang, noticing that Eren sat close beside you, staring at you with calm determined eyes. 

 

He just wouldn't let go....

 

You avoided his contact throughout the entire time when you ate with the others. Eren stayed quiet while you reacted your natural state to make sure you wouldn't make others worry. You were sweating, but not enough to let your teammates notice.

"Sasha, I think that's enough for you. You're going to get super fat." Connie teased.

"No I'm not! I have high 'meta blossom'!" Sasha replied as she chewed her bread.

During a couple times, you cut the bread for Eren to show everyone that you two did nothing while they were gone. And there were times when Eren grabbed ahold of your hand to take the piece of bread from you, causing you to jerk away.

"Make sure you eat up everyone." You announced while they cheered and nodded.

It was like having a family to eat with. You were happy to be with each and everyone of them. It was something you enjoyed everyday. It made you forget your worries. It was like a remedy to you.

After you all finished eating, you quickly helped Armin and Krista clean up the kitchen right before Auruo and his subordinates arrived.

"I smell butter." Petra stated.

"Oi! Don't go eating food without permission, brats!" Auruo clicked his tongue.

"Now now, calm down. We saved some for you." You replied.

"Oh, here. Would you mind putting these away?" Gunther requested.

He hands you three bottles of wine. Never in your entire life had you drank that stuff. Levi once told you it only cures the pain. And if you drank too much, you'll get sick and go out of control. So there was a limit to these powerful drinks called "Wine". You just didn't know how much is "too much" to get you drunk. You hid the wine bottles up in the cupboard while Erd and them continued to finish the rest of the bread and butter, listening to Auruo's complaints about the lack of taste in butter.

"Oh, please, what are you,  a bread-tologist?" Gunther laughs.

"I'm telling ya, there's no salt in these." Auruo shook his head.

"Hey cheer up, at least you won't be sleeping with a hungry stomach tonight."

 

-Time skip-

After everyone went into their rooms and no one was seen, you snuck back into the kitchen to try a bottle of wine. You lit up two candles to give more light and had difficulty of opening the bottle. You wanted to try out the "sour" taste of it. You sat down on the table and took a glass, pouring the liquid into the cup. You hesitantly smelled it first before drinking it. After taking a few sips, you began to feel a little dizzy but you didn't care. You missed Levi. He was gone for too long.

"When will you come?" You ask yourself indirectly while pouring another glass after another. The taste was strong, you disliked the flavor of wine, yet you were told that wine can take away all your worries like a snap of a pair of fingers. You constantly asked yourself about Levi. 

"He's not coming back, (first). He's not... Coming..." You spoke to yourself, your voice slurred.

"You're taking too long, Levi... Are you dead?" You felt a little shaky, losing balance.

You stood up, realizing that you dranked almost all of it. 

"Did I just..." You blinked your eyes, hardly able to make out the images in your eyes. It's as if you were blind, due to your tiredness.

You nearly stumbled onto the ground until someone had caught you.

"Are you drunk?" You hear someone say.

"What? No, that's.. Crazy..." You spoke, leaning against his chest.

"You are..." He says.

You took a quick look at the man who held you. 

"What took you so long? I've been waiting and waiting and waiting for you." You stated.

"What are you talking about?" 

"I missed you so much. How are Hanji and the others? Are they okay too? I thought you died or something."

"Even in your drunk state, you're still concerned about them." He commented.

"Shhh. Everyone's asleep. Let's take it to my room." You suggested.

You thought the man who was holding you was the man you love. But mistakenly, it wasn't.

As soon as he took you to your bedroom, you planted a slobbery kiss on his lips.

"I missed you." You repeated.

"And Eren... Eren... He... Says I'm beautiful.." You commented randomly.

"You are..." He began to kiss your neck fervishly, guiding you to your bed.

"Oh... Your hair grows fast. You should.... Cut it like normal, you clean freak." You closed your eyes, melted under his touch as he hovered over you while you felt his hair. He ignored your comments and continued to shower you with love... And lust.

"I love you...." You chanted in a soft voice..

You felt sleepy, allowing the boy to unclothe you, starting off with your white dress shirt. He reveals your perfect sized breasts and slim curves.

"Ah..." You let out a soft moan, causing him to go on further with you.

"I love you, (First)." He spoke.

"I... Love you..." You hitched your breath, feeling slightly embarrassed.

"You're all I need." He whispers.

"I'm... All you need." You repeated.

"You're all I ever wanted."

"I am what... you want."

He smirked, removing your pants to kiss your thigh on the in.

"N-Not.. There... No..." You blushed, your eyes still closed.

Still, he ignored you and continued on. After he made some marks on your body, he went up to claim your lips once more.

"Ah... Touch me.." You spoke in a slurred voice.

He kept your mouth occupied while he let his hands wander around you, rubbing your soft skin, causing your back to arch. You pulled him close to you, sharing your sour taste with the boy. He licks your lips, wanting you to oblige and you allowed him to. He holds you, kissing you passionately, saliva escaping from the corner of your lips as he softly bit your bottom lip in a teasing way. He moves down to plant hickeys on your neck while you moaned in pleasure and satisfaction, smiling and relaxing while playing with his soft hair.

 

 

"You're mine..." He rasped.

"I'm... Your's...."

 

_Forever......_

 

 

 


	4. Determination

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, it's been a while since I updated this story lol. Here ya go.

Petra came in the room to see your dressed form in bed while Eren sat down on a chair beside you, caressing your soft hand. 

"I thought I heard her scream or something. Is everything alright?" She asked.

"Yeah, she'll be okay. She just had a rough night." Eren chuckled, ignoring Petra's presence, still looking at your pink cheeks and calm eyelids.

"Do you want me to help--"

"No. I'm good, thank you." Eren waved his hand in a lazy circular motion to excuse Petra immediately.

"O-Okay. Just call me when you need--"

"I won't be needing you, thanks." Eren cuts her off.

".....Alright... I hope she feels better." Petra says as she left and closes the door quietly.

Eren leaned over to see your face, horizontal in his eyes. He closes them and gently places his lips onto yours, smelling the sour taste of alcohol. He then removes himself and smiles at your form.

 

_Please forget him....._

 

 

Within a couple hours, you soon had full control of your own body. You no longer felt nauseous and your mind was thinking straight again. You opened your eyes to see that no one was around in the room anymore. You realized that you were now wearing articles of clothing, making you flush. You were worried about what has gotten into Eren during that night. Still, last night was a little hazy and all. You patted your cheeks and brushed your hair with your fingers, cleaning yourself up a little before attempting to leave the room. You made sure you buttoned up your white dress shirt and tugged the collar to straighten it out. You got rid of the solid eye boogers from the corners of your eyes. You took a deep breath and turned the door knob,only to find Eren standing in front of you with a tray of food. At first, he seemed surprised, then he grinned.

"I brought you some food, (name)." He says as you silently yet cautiously allowed him to enter and set the food down.

"You should really get some rest, (Name)." Eren stated as he slid his palms against each other to warm up.

"I'm... Not in the mood to eat right now. Thank you though." You nodded, pushing your bangs back.

Eren paused for a moment to look over your body. Your clothes seemed very loose and it adored you. Your body seemed to be attracting his sight. You noticed this and slowly slipped away from the room. 

"Why are you leaving? You should eat first." Eren suggested.

"I don't really want to Eren. I need to--" You decided to make a run for it but unfortunately, Eren was able to catch you, holding onto your arm to pull you away from your other friends.

"Please eat." Eren begged as he dragged you back into the room successfully and locked the door from behind.

"Eren what are you doing? Y-You're acting weird!" You stepped away from him.

"I just want to help you feel better. Is that a wrong thing to do?" Eren asks innocently.

"Y-You won't let me go!"

"I'm concerned about your health--"

"No! Y-You're... I've never seen you like this before!"

"You must've had a bad dream." Eren commented.

You thought for a moment and held your head.

"I think I'm still in one." You said to yourself.

 

Eren approached to you, rubbing your arms in a comforting way.

"You seem stressful. I want you to regain your strength and eat. It's not healthy to starve and I don't want that from you." Eren spoke in a soft tone.

"O-Okay." You felt uncomfortable around him now. You slightly pushed him away and decided to eat rather than find help. No one should know, otherwise things might get a little ugly.

 

"Do you still feel sick?" Eren sat next to you, leaning forward to peep view of your face.

"Not anymore. The person from last night wasn't me. I went autopilot and I started seeing things." You reminded him in the most polite way possible.

Eren took a moment of silence. Your words hurt him in his chest. He felt as if he's done this for nothing. You were unaware of it until Eren spoke.

"It was you. I know it..... You were my first. You were the one who..." Eren felt offended, rejected.

He stood up, his fists clenched on either side.

"Why are you denying my love!?" Eren shouted abruptly, causing you to look at him.

"Stop telling me that it's not real!" 

"Oh Eren, if only you'd know what it feels like to drink away all your worries." You began to feel angry as well.

"So that's it? You're just going to throw away my feelings for you, just like that?" Eren asked, demanding an answer from you.

"..... Yes...." You didn't intend to hurt him but he had to hear the truth.

His jaw had slacken, trembled. His eyes were widened in pain and shock. 

"How could you do this to me?" Eren's voice had broken due to the fact that he couldn't bare your words of rejection to him.

"Because I still want to stay true to myself. I will not have an affair with you, Eren. I won't allow it." You crossed your arms and legs, glaring at him.

Eren turned away, searching for words to speak.

"I will.... I will do anything to keep you. And there's nothing you can do about it, (name). Even Corporal.  I know you love me too." Eren gave you a hurtful look as he spoke of his vow to you.

"Good luck with that. I highly doubt you'll tear us apart." You tried to build some confidence in you, yet honestly you were afraid of him.

"We'll see about that." Eren wiped his eye with one hand, hinting that he was nearly brought in tears of frustration.

He left the room, finally giving you peace and quietness. You sighed and loosened your tense arms and legs, having no knowledge of dealing this situation. It's not like you were leading him on or anything. You wanted Levi to return as soon as possible. That is, if it's possible.


	5. Secrets, Secrets

"What the--! Who the hell drank up all of this??" Enraged, Auruo held up the empty glass bottle of wine, displaying it for everyone to see.

"Maybe you did." Erd responded while Petra sighed.

"What!? If I finished this all in one night, I wouldn't be here, standing straight and sober! I'm not talking crazy ya know!" Auruo argued.

"But where's the rest of them?" Gunther questioned him.

"Oh! That's right! I remember I gave 'em to (Name) so she could put them away."

"(NAME)!?" Auruo shouted.

People began chattering and exchanging whispers towards each other. 

"Where is she?" Erd asked.

"She's in bed. I heard she wasn't feeling well." Petra answered.

"She's not allowed to drink wine! She knows that! Even Levi ordered us not to let her drink wine!" Auruo interrupted.

"Well who's fault was it that gave her the bottles to hide them?!"

"Nono, who's dumb idea was to buy wine!?"

"Everyone shut up!!" 

The crowd stopped for the loud voice was able to reach their ears. 

You stood there, feeling a little nauseous, yet even though, you were standing there, leaning beside the door for support.

"(N-Name)! You should be in bed!" petra insisted.

"Just a minute!" You held out your index finger.

"Levi will not know anything- and I mean anything about this!"

"B-But...!"

"It's your fault, (Name)!" Auruo pointed at you.

"Why did you drink this?" Erd asked.

"I was just..... Curious about the wine and I got carried away..." You lied.

"Levi forbids you to drink this ever again!"

"Levi is not my father." You swallowed.

"And he shall not, I repeat, NOT know anything about this." 

 

The small crowd stared at you, giving you credit that you had the ability to even stand and give a brief announcement after drinking that huge bottle of wine.

"Everything is normal, alright? I know, it's my fault, I got the idea. But, if any of you has the balls to tell him about this, I will have vengeance." You stared at them with a face of death, bags under your eyes, that tiring expression, those (H/C) strands falling on your cheeks.

"I will be the one who holds responsibility to this mess. And since it was my idea, you should all stay out of it. I will clear your names if he ever starts pointing fingers." You explained.

The crowd responded with silence and possibly, higher respect for you.

"I will now excuse myself." You covered your mouth as you exited and went back to your room, feeling the need to collapse onto the solid cold floor any minute.

 

"Well, that wasn't what I expected but... I'll take it." Erd shrugged.

"Yeah, I can do this." Gunther nodded, agreeing with Erd.

"That's not how we're supposed to deal with this situation!" Auruo whispered.

"You heard her. She said she'll take care of it--"

"And if you tell Corporal Levi about this--"

"You must have a strong stomach." Erd and Gunther explained, finishing each other's sentences.

"Tch! Fine! But when shit goes down, let there be a reminder that I was the one who tried to solve this if we ever get accused, which I'm sure we will!" Auruo argued.

"I'm fine with that. (Name) says that she's got our backs."

"Was there a time where she wasn't there for us?" Gunther asks.

"....... I guess..." Auruo sighed.

 


	6. Camomille Tea

Later that day at night, you felt claustrophobic, wanting some fresh cool air from outside. You grabbed a thin blanket and made your way to the roof of HQ. You can see the stars alive in the sky, gliding so still. You wanted to believe that the people who had passed away turned into little stars who watch the earth from beneath. You felt a little better as soon as the cold air grasped your form. You wrapped the blanket around you and sat down, watching the stars. It was quiet that day. Everyone had gone to sleep. You couldn't. 

 

"Levi... I hope you're not one of the stars." You thought to yourself, sighing.

You were starting to give up hope that he wouldn't return. The squad had never been gone this long before. The expedition must've been abandoned. You wanted to believe that he was still out there. But doubt was beginning to win over your high hopes that were slowly dying out, like a candle in the cold wind, struggling to keep the flame alive. You closed your eyes, deeply inhaling and exhaling. You were thinking too much of him. But that's a good thing, isn't it?

You were becoming one with the cold, rocking left to right, staring at the dark sky up above. Suddenly, you felt a tap on your shoulder, causing you to turn around. You were greeted with something poking your cheek. 

"You shouldn't be out here, y'know." 

 

You quickly turned away, feeling the side of your cheek that was touched.

"I thought you were asleep, Eren." You huffed out air.

"I was worried about you. You weren't in your room so I--"

"Stalker." You silently giggled.

"Here." Eren handed out a warm cup of tea.

Once you hesitantly received it, you made a frown and knitted your brows together. You set the cup down and crossed your arms to rub your arms.

"Eren, you know I hate camomille." You mumbled.

"I know..."

"I'm not in the mood for tea anyways. Thank you though." You sniffed the cold air, feeling refreshed and new.

"You're gonna catch a cold out here." Eren spoke as he wraps one arm around you.

You felt nervous, staring at his hand that was rubbing your shoulder to keep you warm. 

"Why did you bring me camomille? Usually you'd bring me darjeeling." You tried not to make yourself comfortable under his touch. 

"You would cry if you drank that stuff." Eren explained.

 

He was right. Darjeeling would remind you of Levi. Then it would surely make you worry more about his current situation. Eren didn't want that for you. He wanted you to move on and forget the things that would remind you of Levi.

"Eren...." You whispered.

"Hm?" He lowered his head to listen to your words.

"Thank you so much. I'm sorry about earlier.... I think... I'll be okay now.... I bid you Goodnight." 

You pulled away and stood up to walk back to your room but you were stopped by him.

"... You're so cruel." Eren commented as he looked down.

"Huh?"

"We were so close back then... What happened to us? I want to be close to you again." Eren brought your cold fingertips to his lips.

You gasped, removing your hand away, holding it from him.

"You're not okay Eren. You need to get some sleep, alright?"

"Are you afraid of me?" 

"What? N-No, of course not, Eren.--"

"Do you hate me?"

"N-No." You shook your head.

"Then why can't I touch you? Why can't I stay by your side?" He asked in a soft yet hurtful tone,as if he was pleading or begging.

"You don't want to be friends anymore?"

"No, I still want us to be friends, Eren." 

 

His face lit up in surprise. You looked away, keeping your hands at your sides.

"Then..." He reached out to you, resting his warm hand on the side of your arms, giving them a gentle squeeze. You hesitantly allow him, wanting to stay strong and show that you weren't afraid, that you didn't hate him, that you wanted friendship.

"I bid you goodnight as well, (Name)." He softly mumbled in your ear, like a lullaby. His lips touched the shell of your ear as he spoke these words.

He then pulled away and left the roof first. 

You looked down, feeling sweaty and a hint of panic. 

"

 


	7. Rain

The next day had come. You decided to take a walk outside of HQ. You wore your casual attire and stepped outside the doors, inhaling the fresh air in the morning. You sighed with a faint smile. After a couple steps out of the HQ zone, you heard your name calling from behind.

"(Name)!"

You turned and narrowed your eyes to see the young brunette running after you. He wore a plain white T with a brown sweater with rolled up sleeves. He seemed like any normal villager back at home rather than a soldier. As soon as he caught his breath, you stopped your tracks to wait for him.

"Can I walk with you?" Eren requested as you nodded and continued on walking without a word.

"Hah, it's a pretty cloudy today." He commented as he stares into the sky covered in dark fog. 

"Yeah." You played with your fingers, strolling down the trail with Eren beside you.

It was quiet for a moment before Eren sparked up a colloquial conversation to fill the silence roaming between the two of you.

 

"So where are you going?" Eren asked.

"I'm just going to walk around town for a bit. I kinda miss it, that's all." You answered.

"Ah, that sounds.... Fun..." He nodded.

"Psh, not really."

"Oh." He looks away, feeling awkward.

"We should've brought an umbrella--"

"Too late, we're already here. I think we'll be fine." You cut him off, walking through the crowd as he struggled to stay on your heels. 

As you passed through the people in town, you noticed how peaceful the atmosphere. You knew that the things you see beyond the walls had changed you more than these people with wide smiles on display. You felt out of place in town, as if you didn't belong there. You felt indifferent, solitary. Priests constantly worshipping the walls, children roaming around freely, men and women laughing, that's the future you desire to live in once humanity has reclaimed its own independence and freedom without the walls ever surrounding them. 

"Whoa there," Eren reaches out to grab your hand, causing you to pause..

"I almost lost you," He laughed as you gave him a smile to show that everything's okay.

You allowed him to hold hands with you. He stumbled from behind as he you went on forward.

"Make sure you don't get lost. I might let go." You happily warned him.

"Alright then." Eren squeezes your hand firmly while you guided him.

 

You led him to the place he had never seen before. You went to the river under the bridge and picked up some rocks. 

"Watch this." You silently spoke as he began to observe.

You threw the flat stones into the river, causing it to skip along the stream. Eren watched in awry and complements your skills.

"You try." You handed him a small pebble with flat sides.

He attempted to imitate your actions but he failed to do what you did.

"Oh.... It didn't skip." Eren stated.

"That's okay. I did this when I was young. It took a lot of practice for me." You explained to him.

"Really?"

"Yeah." You nodded.

"Huh." Eren was impressed with your ability. You sat down and studied the flow of the clear river. Eren joined you shortly. And after that, the sound of thunder came.

"It's going to rain." You announced quietly.

"Yeah." Eren replied.

Light rain began pouring down. You stood up to feel the water trickle down from your fingertips to your palm. Within a split second, the storm was bringing cats and dogs down to earth. Water splashes onto your face as you backed away from it.

"We're gonna have to stay here for a while until the rain stops." Eren says as he stood up to walk behind you.

"Hmmm." You hummed in response.

"We can always.... Run too." Eren suggested.

You searched for the nearest roof to stay under. 

"There." You pointed an abandoned church that wasn't too far away.

Eren followed where your eyes were darting.

"Alright then, let's go--" Before Eren could grab ahold of your hand, you were already sprinting towards your destination.

He finally caught up and ran with you in the same speed, even though he was faster than you. You could've swore the abandoned church was close by but now that you see it clearly, the old building was far off. You wore a bored expression, realizing that you had made the decision to get drenched in your clothes. But you had to admit it, the church was closer to you than any other building.

Once you reached the old church, you drained out the water from your hair and wiped your face.

"Phew... The sky is raining harder and harder." You looked up to hear the drumming sound of the raindrops hitting the wooden roof. There were leaks here and there yet you ignored them.

"Achoo!" Eren sneezed.

"You alright?" 

"Yeah, I'm just a little cold, that's all." He sniffed as he peeled off his top. 

You crossed your arms to stay warm but to no avail. Your body heat was leaving you. Your fingers were freezing. You blew out hot air in order to feel your numb fingers. 

"You need to undress yourself, otherwise you'll catch a cold." Eren says as he watches you from a distance.

"I'd rather catch a cold than have you see my naked body." You responded.

"Don't be so stubborn. It's my job to look after you--"

"Since when?" You raised a brow.

"Who knows? Now, off with the top." Eren commanded.

"Who are you to order me around?" You asked.

"I said you'll catch a cold. I don't want that for you." 

"What am I going to use to cover my naked body? There's nothing here to--"

  
You saw him approach you with open arms. You slowly shook your head, realizing the cover that stood before you.

"Nonononono, I am not going to do that." You refused to do that.

"It's alright." Eren spoke softly while he embraced your drenched form with his warm body.

"Eren--"

"It's fine, I'm good." Eren interrupted.

You awkwardly stood still with Eren, your chest pressed against his.

"Aren't you going to be cold?"

"I'll manage." Eren shrugged as he gently rocks you back and forth.

 

You pushed him away, taking a couple steps back. 

"Okay, what are you trying to do?" You held out a palm against him.

"What?"

"You can't just hug me like that." 

"I'm doing it because I'm concerned about your health. You're cold." Eren tells you.

"I-It's not just about that--"

 

A thunderstorm interfered and created a ferocious roar, causing you to yelp and close your ears. Eren found your retreating form cute. 

"I told you we should've brought an umbrella."

  
Serves you right for running in the cold.

 

"I don't need one. I'm fine on my own." You tried to keep your cool and dropped your hands to your side.

"Are you sure?" Eren asks.

"Yes." You nodded.

 

A moment of hesitation came to mind when Eren invited you into his arms again.

"I'm fine, Eren." You shook your head.

"You said that we're friends." Eren recalled.

"Yeah?"

"What am I to you if I don't offer you warmth?" Eren questioned you.

"Uh.... Is that a trick question?" You tried to change the subject.

"No." He scoffed.

"Ah, no thanks. I appreciate your help." You say as you sat down and listened to the rain.

Eren still wore his pants. His body heat was rising again. He hung his shirt on one of the benches nearby and sat down with you.

"We're going to be here for a long time." Eren sighed.

"Yep." You nodded and clapped your hands together.

 

 You prayed that the rain would stop now.


	8. Sym(pathetic)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for this super late update! I kinda got a little lazy after dealing with so much things('Tis a crazy year already :'D) Plus, I kinda got carried away playing the Final Fantasy Franchise (X). *Cough Cough* I highly recommend you gamers to play it if ya'll want a super good story with amazing (blah blah blah). Ahh it's so beautiful :')

"(Name), do you hate me that much?" Eren avoids your cautious stance and scoffed in a hurtful manner.

 

Judging his facial expression, he didn't seem hurt but angry and irritated. 

 

"You think that Heichou has the potential to come back after all this time?" He turns away with a disappointed look in his eyes.

 

".... I'm sorry Eren. I didn't mean to get all offensive." You lowered your guard and sighed, detecting no sign of danger coming from the boy himself. He seemed like he didn't pay attention to your words, as if he ignored your existence.

 

"But even if he's gone, I think I still wanna believe it. I guess, I'm just trying to find some way to-" You paused for a moment and looked down at your feet with a frown while your arms hang freely by your sides.

 

"-To move on." Your tone of voice dies out after you spoke your last word.

 

His attention reverts back to you once again, staring at you while spacing out. It's like he was coming up with some idea.

 

"Hey, I lost people too. People who I love. The feeling of loneliness applies to all of us, (Name). Can't you see that? Everyone in the Corps has lost someone important in their lifetime. Not one in this world has been living a life of luxury without worries or doubts.... Maybe except the King but nonetheless... Look at us." Eren spreads his arms open to show you a bigger picture of what he was trying to get at.

 

"We're all here, helping one another, flesh and alive. You still have people who care about you. Holding onto Heichou will only slow you down," He explained.

 

You thought of his words and hesitantly nodded afterwards.

 

"I get what you're saying. I guess it's not healthy for me to keep thinking that he's still alive, huh?" You approached the brunette and sat beside him.

 

"I'll never fall in love again, Eren." You announced weakly.

 

He didn't know how to respond to that. He still harbored feelings for you. He had many things run through his mind of you. Hearing your final and foremost words hurt him. He indirectly managed to break the bond that sealed your fate with Levi. With that, the corner of his lips curved upwards.

 

"So there's no chance of me winning your heart, I'm guessing?" He silently whispered.

 

"What?" You leaned over to have him repeat his words since you couldn't really hear him.

 

 

_Why are you always nice to me? It's like a scent that's bringing me back everywhere I go._

 

 

Eren stood up as you watched from below. 

 

"Did you hear that? I said that it stopped raining." Eren spoke in a normal tone.

 

"Oh. Well, let's head back then." You picked up your feet and began to stroll out of the old tattered building while Eren followed you.

 

He noticed a faint light shine on your figure from behind as you walked. For some reason, this distant light specified your beautiful features. He got distracted by your body language.

 

"You coming?" Your teeth chattered, which turned out the bright light that was shining on you just a second ago. You rubbed your arms to create warm heat through friction.

 

"Yes."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry that this was a little short but the next one will definitely be chapter length lol. I am honestly running out of ideas to be honest. It's strange 'cuz I'm usually able to make things up as I go when writing my uncoordinated stories. BUT I will definitely finish this story within 2016! Somehow! -_-''


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